Awwwwwwwwww, Shit! Yo,
check it out, man, ICP back in the haugh man!
Violent-J, man, 2 Dope,
man, wicked clownz, man. Ha ha ha!
Hey, quick, hurry up,
bang.
Open your mouth cause
here comes my wang.
I'm Violent-J, the
southwest skitzo.
Born in a big top
magical-majisto
Dead-body disco. Rappin'
to the hoochies.
Dirty old fat hoe's come
up with a smoochie.
Hoochie-coochie, la la la
la la.
I might pull your tongue
out your mouth and try to hang ya.
It's a full moon and the
riddles are calling.
Three more cards and the
skies will be falling.
But don't take it from
me, I'm just a clown.
Wicked clown, wicked
town,
Juggalugagaluga lick it
down, man up till my nuts start singing, dancing,
hopping,
I'm a keep bringing
riddles and tricks and dead body chicks
With the swing of my
magical wand,
The show must go
on.
"Well, it all began when
I was very young. My feelings were so excited about the carnival
rides. Everyone was jolly and jittery. I waited for their wackets
until well after dusk. That night, while I was sleeping, I was
awoken by a glow appearing. And, looking out, I saw strange men,
cursing and filthy, and there were clowns, setting up their dreary
tent."
I'm 2 dope and I sport
tight wranglers.
Don't say a word or I'll
kick ya in the neck bitch.
Everybody 'round, make
way for the clown,
In New York, in LA, in
southwest town.
Walked into El Rays,
almost got my ass kicked.
Rather just chill in the
yard in my casket.
Call up the hoe's have
'em swing by the tomb,
And get a little stinky
stank up in this bitch.
Killer clowns kicked out
the circus.
Used to get live let the
midget ladies work this.
I was a freak show, they
called me the pogo.
I can make my ballsack
bob like a yoyo.
"Give it up! Give it
up!"
Southwest looney tune,
killed another red neck fun,
His head a looney dune,
gooney boon, gooney goon,
I can hear the loons in
my head as I sing my wicked song.
The show must go
on.
"I've never been afraid
of clowns but these clowns were different. There was nothing funny
about these clowns at all. The smiled, they juggled, they
laughed,
but yet something was
terribly, terribly, wrong. I didn't like these clowns for I could
see through them, I knew what they were really like. I knew that
this carnival that had come
to my village was an
evil, evil thing."
(Chorus):
Come see the show, big
top show,
Walk hand in hand with
the dead carnival.
Dead carney, carnies,
dead juggalos.
Walk hand in hand with
the dead carnival.
(End chorus)
You ask do we gang, do we
bang in a gang, mang?
Do we bang-bang? I'm a
gang banger, man!
I bang in a gang,
mang.
You can suck my wang,
mang.
Richie-boy, bitchie-boy,
it's a southwest thing.
Serial murderer,
southwest maniac,
Slaughterer, lunatic,
highschool brainiac,
Straight A school boy,
School kid
Till I went to school and
tried to murder everyone, the show must go on.
"Aged friends are fools,
all of them. Totally unaware of the evilness within the carnival.
Their eyes reflected stairways into hell, their faces covered in
blood. I ran from the carnival grounds and yet every road and
every path lead me right back to
the big tent. I had to
escape from the strongman, the freak shows, and the
Ringmaster..."
(Chorus)
(Chorus)
Heh heh heh
heh!
HAH HAH HAH HAH
HAH!
~Rrrrrinnnng~
"Yello?"
"Speak ta... Chicken
Neck?"
"Who?"
"Chicken
neck."
"Nobody by that name
here."
"What about Chicken
Balls?"
"Nope."
"What about Chicken
fuckin' Gizzard Throat, is he there?"
"Look boy, you got the
wrong number."
~click~
~Rrrrrinnnng~
"What the...?
Hello?!"
"Speak ta
Rednuts?"
"Who?"
"Redballs, Willie Redneck
Balls, is he there?"
"Goddamnit!"
~click~
~Rrrrrinnnng~
"Lemme git dis! Who in da
hell is dis?!"
"Speak ta
Fatboy?"
"WHO IN DA HELL IS
DIS?!"
"I wanna speak ta Fat
Redneck fuckin' Chickenboy! Is he there?"
"Goddamnit! ~click~
Fuckin' no good bastards!"
~knock knock knock
knock~
"Git da damn
door!"
"Yeah, I have a delivery
for a Mr. Redneck Fatballs."
"You have a collect call
from 'Cukoo'. Please answer the following
question 'yes' or
'no'."
"Will you pay for the
call?"
"Is this on?
Gather round my wealthy
friends,
And endure the horrifying
sights
Only your worst
nightmares could produce.
Actual human beings of a
deformed nature.
Come at once, and come
and endulge yourself
In our own twisted
amusement of another's misfortune.
Yes, ladies and
gentlemen.
Enter our 3 ring show of
freaks!"
Ring one,
a-dung-a-dung-dung.
My name's Violent J and I
staple my tongue
To the desk in school,
then I run down the hall.
Scarin the shit outta all
of yall bitches!
Which is why you don't
invite mine to your party
Just cuz I don't look
like everybody.
I guess you're just a
bunch of rich boys.
Bitch boys. Scary.
Blblbblah!
And what's the big deal
about my neck.
Just because now and then
I like to let it stretch up
A couple feet to get a
better sight.
Is that any reason to
scream and run in fright?
No! So, now how ya gon'
act?
So what if I got another
arm growin' outta my back.
I guess I'm just another
freak show thing
And now they got me in
the 3 rings.
(chorus):
3 ring. A ding a ding
ding. People love to point and stare.
3 ring. A ding a ding
ding. It's the same as everywhere.
(End Chorus)
(chorus)
Ring two! How do ya do?
I'm Shaggy 2-dope.
Chicken-faced bitch!
(Who?)
You don't try to front
hoe.
Try to play me out just
cuz I'm runnin wit the side show.
So maybe there's the leg
growin out my neck.
But, don't jet baby, huh,
not yet.
Popped out the neden like
a pund of lead.
Doctor blew his back,
rolled and dropped me on my head.
Oh shit! I knew it had to
fuck up my circuits.
Cuz, when I was 2, my
momma left me at the circus.
Abandoned at the
carnival, with the freak shows
Like Bat-boy,
Hermaphrodite, and Old Man Crow.
But then I escaped to the
ghetto zone.
Started a crew of my own
mutha fucka, I'm not alone.
So don't be stickin' your
finger in my face stank.
Or your stomach might
recieve a shank from the 3 rings.
(chorus)
(chorus)
"I certainly hope you're
enjoying yourselves, here, at our 3 ring
exhibit. But,
to be honest,
I
really don't see what's
so fuckin' funny about it. These fuckin' people are
real!"
"Ring 3, The ICP! Look if
you want,
But I wouldn't lay a hand
on me.
That's how you get fucked
up.
We'll squeeze your
windpipe's shut."
Yo! I'm a nerd, word. I
drink Thunderbird.
Half-snake woman kicked
my love to the curb.
She busted in to my tent
now I'm fucked.
Had the fat-bearded lady
in the buck. Ugh!.
Fuck that. Bitch suck
that.
I was born with a wang,
but I never had a nutsack.
It's two balls hangin'
wit no protection, so,
I move real careful and
slow.
You can call me a wierdo,
call me a freak.
Call me Don Knotts cuz
I'm gettin at it every week. Uh!
So come see the carnival
and throw me your change, bitch.
I chill with the 3
rings.
(chorus)
(chorus)
"Well, that's it. I hope
you're satisfied. I hope you had a good time,
you fucking
heartless
bastards! You saw what
you wanted, so grab your fucking kids and that
fat, flop of
shit
wife of yours, and get
the fuck out of our circus tent! You cold-hearted sons of
bitches!
You think they looked
fucked up? Just wait till I kick your fuckin' lips in a couple
times!
You'll be sittin' up here
like a bitch, and we'll be laughin at your
folded ass. They'll
call
you Lumpy. After I done
puttin knots all over your fuckin forehead. Yeah!
Hey, Hey little boy! Come
here, how'd you like it if I tied your neck in a knot?
You
fuckin' little
bitch!
Come here, I'll fuckin
shove that corndog up your ass! Get the fuck outta here! The
show's fuckin' over. Get the fuck outta here, you fuckin heartless
bastards."
Welcome to another
exciting episode of Daray's #1 game show: The Joker's
Wild!
Shaggy, tell us something
about tonight's contestants.
HA HAHA Hey, mudda
fuckas! Get ready for the killer show for this bitch!
We
got a cop,
we got a judge, and we
got a redneck. So step the fuck up and play
The Joker's
Wild!
(WooHoo!)
Everybody
smile!
Guess who's back on your
underground dial! (who?)
It's the game show host
wit the most (Violent J)
And tonight we gonna have
a little pig roast. (hehe-huh)
Top copper! It's been a
long while!
Lace up your boots and
come on down the aisle.
Mr. Big Man packin' that
steel.
But tonight you ain't
shit. Now spin the fuckin' wheel!
Looks good nice try! Now
let's see just how you gon' die!
Lucky, lucky, it landed
on Carpenter Jed.
He just pounds nails in
your forehead.
The pig got lucky that
time. But let's take a look.
Who's next down the line.
Oh, the 43rd District Judge.
Hey pal! Remember me? You
threw me in jail!
Take a spin or I'll snap
your neck. The clicker's landed.
Let me check. The Jookie,
hey it ain't bad at all.
We just cut your face off
and slap your skull. ~slap!~
Who's next for the games
and fun? Hillbilly Earl, C'mon down! Run!
The redneck that sic'ed
his dog on me.
Now that's gonna cost you
a spin buddy!
Spin around and around it
goes! Staple your lips shut, cut off your toes!
Then I throw your corpse
on top of the pile.
Anything goes on the
Joker's Wild.
"Tell me. Who killed
seventeen people and later ate their dead bodies?"
~timer
clicking~
"Jeffrey
Dommer?"
"No! The correct answer
would be your mother!"
"WAAA!"
"Shaggs?"
"Aww shit, mutha fuckas.
Get ready for round 2 in this bitch! So if you want your fuckin'
neckbone chopped, step the fuck up and play The Joker's
Wild!"
Ya like big money and
prizes don't ya?
You'd probably kill for a
big prize won't ya?
You little bitch! It's
your turn to spin. (ding ding ding)
"Free money!"
Now spin again. Oh goody,
now unzip your drawers.
I'm gonna clip this chain
on your balls!
Raise you upsidedown for
the big batta.
Now we bust your head
like a piniata! (Yeahhhh!!)
The audience loves that
shit!
Listen to 'em scream when
your forehead splits
Wait, cut to a break! Oh
shit dat-damn uh, we got guts on the camera.
"The Joker's Wild is
brought to you by:" "Faygo!"
Everybody sing! "Send yo'
momma straight up to tha sto'! Tell that bitch to bring home a
Faygo!"
Welcome back to the
carnival show! Here's your chance for the big money cash
flow!
Hit your buzzer, pull
your lever! Joker, Joker, Lemon!
We sever your head! Pick
a door! 1,2,or 3
It's the same behind
every door, me!
There's no escape. Now
gimme that bald head!
The crowd can't help,
look, their all dead!
And they just watchig
their doom.
We broadcast from hell to
your living room.
I ripped off his
neckbone, wicked clown style.
Anything goes on The
Joker's Wild.
"It's time to play hit or
miss! Contestant #1, open your mouth!
Contestant
#2,
get ready!
Will he hit or
miss?"
~spear
hitting~
"He Hit!"
[crowd]
Yeaahhhhh!
"What's
next?!"
"We got money, we got
cash, we got prizes! We got blood, we got cocks, we got naked dead
bitches! On The Joker's Wild!"I got my yellow suit, and my purple
tie.
Somebody's gonna die! Oh,
my!
It's Mr. Thompson my next
door neighbor.
Always bitchin'! Yellin'
from the kitchen... window.
See he died then he went
to hell, though.
We meet again! I got my
own game show.
Spin the wheel 'cuz I
just can't fuck around.
~Rrrrrrinnnnnnngg!~
"Bonus
round!"
Oh, shit! The end of the
game. Bonus round.
We goin out with a bang!
You got a chance for money and prizes!
You got a chance at death
too! (eheheh)
So get ready, I'm comin'
at ya fast!
Your chance for freedom
at last!
Four questions. So are ya
ready Jack?
"Uhhh, I-I think
so..."
Load the gun!
"The
governor..."
"Beechpot?"
"Yes! The square root of
2..."
"Uhhh..."
"Correct! Nutsacks don't
belong in..."
"Buttcracks?"
"Richboys
eat..."
"Caviar?"
"NOOO! The correct answer
is 'bullets'!"
~machine gun
fire~
"Oh hoho! Oho Geez! Oh!
Well, this is Big Chipperwinks saying 'so long' till next week
folks! Seeya later! Goodbye!"
"This is a Channel 7 news
brief because the news is happening now!
Good evening, Mort
Perkins reporting. Our top story tonight: Police and investigators
are still trying to figure out how and why somebody stole four
dead bodies from the Wayne County morgue late Monday night. Police
say the apparent body theif
entered
through the basement
window, but how they eluded the security and alarm
system is still
a
mystery. But what we at
Channel 7 are wondering: What kinda sick FUCK would steal four
dead bodies anyway? Details at 11.
"Dead bodies, dead bodies
all over the street.
55-65, bodies at
least.
I hang with the stiffs
till the break of dawn.
I'm always finding bodies
when I'm mowing the lawn.
Drag 'em in the house,
throw 'em in the oven.
Wicked clown lovin' that
dead body grubbin'.
Tastes like chicken,
finger lickin deepfried.
I ate a dead body, but
don't tell. I lied.
I just ate my first dead
body last week,
Still got the fingernail
caught in my teeth.
Before ya start yellin'
and cursin' my name,
Remember somethings wrong
with my brain, insane.
Second I was born, doctor
threw me against the wall.
Kicked open the doors and
he whipped me down the hall.
I'm sliding and I'm
boucin' off shit like a hockey puck.
And my mother's like,
"What the fuck?!"
He said I was born of an
alien race.
Born with a hatchet and a
juggalo face.
But I'm not a martian,
you wouldn't understand.
I'm just a dead body
man.
"We've got bodies! Dead
bodies! We got fat ones, skinny ones, males,
females,
hermaphrodites! We got
somebodies! We got nobodies! Bodies, bodies,
bodies!
WOO!"
Dead bodies, dead bodies
in the back of my van.
All the little kiddies
love the dead body man.
I drive through my
neighborhood ringin' my bell.
Some people run cause
they don't like the smell.
Others line up just as
quick as they can.
To try to catch a glimpse
of the dead body man.
It's all good, if you can
stand the funk. but uh.....
Just don't look in the
trunk.
I drive down central
kickin the bass.
Chillin' with my freaks
and I'm pickin' her face.
Maggots and bugs like to
crawl on her head.
Cause my bitch is dead,
I'd rather that instead.
I'm a hoe you can't
trust, always diggin a nut.
A dead body bitch learned
to keep her mouth shut.
Riding in the back is my
dead body crew.
Only they can never think
of nothin' to do.
If you think I'm sick,
take a look at yourslf.
You got dead deer heads
up on your shelf.
On your key chain is a
little baby rabbit's hand.
I'm just the dead body
man.
"We also collect dead
bodies! So if you know any dead people, or you yourself are
planning on dying soon, we'll be happy to come to your house and
pay cash for it! We appreciate good, healthy, stiffs for our
dinner! WAHOO!"
Call me the dead body man
(Some'll give 'em to me!)
Call me the dead body man
(Just sell 'em to me!)
Call me the dead body man
(You can mail 'em to me!)
Call me the dead body man
(But, Bring 'em to me!)
Call me the dead body man
(Won't ya give 'em to me!)
Call me the dead body man
(You can sell 'em to me!)
"Welcome sons of fuckin'
bitches to the wicked carney theater! Tonight's feature
presentation is so fuckin' scary, it'll take the wrinkles out of
your nut sack and fade your butt hair. So get ready mutha fuckers
for tonight's main atraction! I
give to you: Ol' Evil
Eye! Ah ha ha ha!"
~clapping~
"Alright shut the fuck
up!"
"Start tha
movie."
"I loved the old man. He
had never wronged me. He had never given me insult. For his gold I
had no desire. I think it was his eye. Yes, it was this.
One
of his eyes resembled
that of a vulture. A pale, blue eye with a film over
it.
Whenever it fell upon me,
my blood ran cold. And so, by degrees, very gradually, I made up
my mind to take the life of the old man and thus rid myself of the
eye forever."
So I'm headed door to
door
With my grandmother's
cookie jar.
I'm sellin' cookies, 12
for a dollar.
I ring the doorbell,
nobody wants any.
I resort to goin' cheaper
- 2 for a penny.
Anybody, everybody, they
hate me.
I can tell when they spit
and degrade me.
There's only one house
left, the last on the block.
Old Man Willie on the
hilltop.
I ring the doorbel, the
door creeps open.
And there it was starin'
and scopin'.
The man's left eye, red,
big, and drippin'
I was trippin'. "Ahh,
seeya!"
I ran home. I couldn't
stop thinking
About his eyeball winking
and blinking.
And it looked not a damn
thing like the other. Ugh!
Shoulda wore a patch on
the motherfucker.
It hypnotized me,
mesmorized me.
Traumatized, paralyzed,
terrorized me.
Creepers, where'd you get
that ball?
And tell me how it even
fits in your skull.
(prechorus):
I want a big long knife
to stick it in.
I wanna lift up the
eyelid and kick it in.
He's gotta die. I want
his eye buried in my backyard.
It ain't hard, I'm
killin' Old Evil Eye!
(End
prechorus)
(chorus):
Evil eye...
Oh-Oh-Eye (The bitch gon'
die! Die-die-die-die-die-die-die)
Evil eye...
Oh-Oh
(End
chorus)
"Now this is the point.
You fancy me mad. Madmen know nothing. But you should've seen me.
You should have seen how wisely I proceeded with caution
with
what foresight, with what
patience I went to work. I was never kinder to the old man than
during the whole week before I killed him."
A day gone pass since I
heard about J.O.
Met up in this sleigh,
cuz I don't fuckin' play.
Anyway, I gotta do him
in. Got a rusty revolver
Put the silver bullets
in.
I'm plannin' on playin'
one right to his nugget.
Down my drawers with the
bucket.
It's time to go, fuck
it.
I stuck it up... to his
neck when he came to the door.
I really didn't know what
I was in for.
First the cold man
stared, no a gaze, no a stare.
Kinda like there was no
one there.
How weird, my body froze
with the blink of his eye.
Evil eye, sendin' chills
up my spine.
What to do? What to do? I
gotta try to break.
I gotta try to make.. my
way to the gate.
Wait. I can't move, I'm
stuck to the ground.
W-What the fuck was that?
I think I heard a sound,
Turned around, there it
was, starin' at my face.
This little old man's
eye's a make me a mental case.
That's when I felt the
pain deep inside,
Deep inside, now his
eye's open wide.
(prechorus)
(chorus)
"That night it ceased.
The old man was dead. I placed my hands on the
heart and there for many
minutes there was no pulsation. He was stone dead. His
eye
will trouble me no
longer. His eye will trouble me no longer."
