If you have a
message to all the juggalos e-mail them to me at
Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
From:
Shaggy2dope89960@cs.com
Date:
Fri, 2 Nov 2001 20:33:12 EST
Subject:
Forgotten Freshnes 3 !
To:
Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
Yeah
thats right there will be Forgotten Freshnes 3 coming out Dec 18,
2001 just in time for Christmas so you wont have to wait til next
year to get the wicked shit! The F.G.F 3 will have hidden tracks
as well as non-released tracks from this past year so it should be
freakin' hot so pick one or as many as you like at your local
store on the 18th of December!
M.C.L to you
and the rest of the Juggalo Family,
(0=
Krazy
Kidd
Kos A.K.A Keith Bailey =0)
Ps.
Down 4
Life! The next Message will be the all mighty Sixth Joker's Card,
Write
back so I know you got the e-mail! Thanx for taking your time on
reading
this e-mail form me! =0)
From:
Shaggy2dope89960@cs.com
Date:
Sat, 3 Nov 2001 13:51:58 EST
Subject:
Bulletin Board News!
To:
Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
Well
juggalos, There is something I need to tell that will blow your
mind! Let's see, its near Christmas time and its a cd from ICP,
Twiztid, and Blaze. Yeah thats right, there is a new cd coming out
this December on the 18th called Forgotten Freshnes Vol. 3 ! This
cd is hot and has the hardest shit that you where never ever to
have and has the non-released tracks that no one has heard of and
now you can have all that and more at your local store on the 18th
of December so, Mark your calenders now so you wont forget to pick
one up. Well, thats all for now and Much Clown Love to all you
juggalos!
M.C.L,
Keith
Bailey
Date: Wed,
5 Jul 2000 22:41:57 -0700 (PDT)
From:
Santiago Aguilar <anarcrow@yahoo.com>
Subject:
JUGGALOS UNITE!!!!!!!!
To:
Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
"Alright
juggalo, we need ur help. The ICP bulletin board at www.imusic.com
is being invaded by a bunch of Slim Anus Lovers. I would really
appreciate it if you came to help us stamp these fucking pansies
out. It would also really help if you gathered up as many fellow
juggalos as possible to show these fucking pussies whose boss. Im
also e-mailing this same message to some other people I find in
the internet who are big ICP fans so with your support, this could
become a real war. You dont have to e-mail me back, just come to
www.imusic.com, search for Insane Clown Posse and be ready to do
some major dissin. DOWN WITH SLIM ANUS AND HIS GAY
MUSIC!!!!!!!!!!"
From:
KLoWNLuVMaNa420@aol.com
Date:
Sun, 10 Sep 2000 16:21:34 EDT
Subject:
The Story...again... =)
To: Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
For
tha Juggalos.
"Wait!
Does it have to end up like this?"
"Bitch!
NOW you want to back out?! YOU had to fuck with me. YOU had to be
the bitch ass talking shit right? YOU were the one who said you
wanted to go, so let's go, muthafucka! Why you wanna be a bitch
and pussy out now?! Like my ninja J put it, 'no body fucks with a
juggalo." Mana was toe to toe with Crystal, a bitch that liked to
front like she was a friend then turn around and stab your ass in
the back. Crystal had called Mana several times to talk shit and
threaten her. Mana wasn't gonna take anymore, so she gave Crystal
what she wanted, a one on one, all out beat down; and Mana knew
she'd be the victor. Perhaps out of sheer instinct, Crystal swung
first. Mana ducked it, and hit Crystal hard with a strong uppercut
straight to the jaw. She landed flat on her ass, and not to Mana's
surprise, she got up. Crystal was a hard headed bitch, no doubt
she could take a good hit. She took the hit, but was shaken by it.
But Mana wasn't that stupid, she brought "insurance" in case
Crystal decided to pull any stunts. Sure enough, Crystal pulls a
long metal rod out of the leg of her baggy jeans and held it like
a bat. She swings...and swung too hard, Mana saw it coming and
dodged. Crystal struggled to regain composure, and Mana brought
the small finger blade she had in her left hand out of it's sheath
and aimed for Crystal's shoulder. (Slice)! Severed the nerve in
her right shoulder and Crystal instantly dropped the metal rod.
She looked at Mana with fear, and ran in the other direction,
gripping her bleeding shoulder. Mana just smiled and relished in
her victory.
* * *
*
A few
days passed until Mana stumbled upon Crystal again. Only this
time, Crystal had her entire crew with her, and they were headed
straight for Mana. They soon were directly in front of her,
Crystal's boyfriend inches from her face, and Crystal was behind
him, her arm heavily bandaged. "You wanna fuck with people? Fuck
with this, bitch." He said, and took a step back, lifted and
fired. Mana fell backwards, and hit the ground limp. Blood oozing
out of the bullet hole in her forehead. Everything was
dark....
* * *
*
"uuhhhnnn..."
Mana sat up holding her pounding head. She looked around, severely
disoriented. Nothing was familiar...how did she get here? There
was nothing around except rolling green hills and it was dusk. The
sky was a deep red and the landscape looked black. Just then, her
eyes focused something at the top of a nearby hill, it appeared to
be a caravan of circus wagons. What the hell was this anyway? The
wagons pulled up abruptly and came to a screeching halt....the
driver look maniacal as he glared at her eerily from under his
ringmaster's hat. He brought his face just inches from hers...and
just as he was about to speak, he didn't. He just smiled and sat
back and looked at her. How strange, and yet, surprisingly
familiar....somehow she knew where she
was.
A
voice interrupted her thoughts then, "Welcome, Mana, to the after
life! And welcome, Mana, to the Dark Carnival!" That was Violent J
from the Insane Clown Posse! She couldn't believe it! She made it
to the carnival! With a wave of J's hand, the bare landscape
became the Big Top. Then, just behind J, out from one of the
wagons stepped Shaggy 2 Dope. Holy shit! I'm really here! But
wait....I was always on their side...."Don't worry little juggalo.
You ain't here to be condemned. You have to see the show The
Amazing Jeckel Brothers put on. Right through that door down
there." Mana looked across the tent to the five doors that were
spread out before her. She recognized them all....Carnival of
Carnage, the Ringmaster, Riddlebox, the Great Milenko, and the
Amazing Jeckel Brothers-the one she was bound
for.
Mana
heard the door close behind her as she stepped into pitch
darkness. Silence. Then, the sound of a match being struck
resounded throughout the room and instantly an inferno erupted
before her. There, in the midst of it all, stood an elderly man.
The flames burned low as the old man spoke to her. "I am here to
present two guardians. The keeper of morals and the keeper
wickedry. Witness my child, witness the light....of the Amazing
(he strikes a match and lights a small white, skull shaped candle)
Jeckel Brothers!" Suddenly two faces appear above two candles.
Jack had a sinister smile, the other a frustrated frown. She knew
of the two well. Their juggling act started immediately, the fiery
orbs being tossed between the two had images of Mana inside them.
Her acts of kindness, her acts of cruelty, and her acts of
justice. Jack threw curves to try to get his brother to miss one,
drop it, and condemn the teenager to eternal punishment. Jake
caught every one, and soon storm clouds appeared overhead. The
brothers turned their focus upward as the clouds parted and an
awesome white light spilled onto the ground where Mana stood. Her
body slowly began to levitate toward the source of the
illumination. Wait, what am I doing?!
she
thought. I did everything I could to get this far, and I'm just
gonna let it be over with?! "Wait!" She screamed. She stopped and
hovered over Jack and Jake's heads.
"What?"
J asked impatiently.
"I
have a request...if it's alright with you
two...?"
Shaggs
looked at J, "Yo, she's a juggalo, man."
"Alright,"
J sighed, "what is it?"
Mana
fidgeted with her fingers, not sure about how she should put this.
"Well...I
was wondering.....you think I could be down? You know, run with
you
guys, spreadin the message?" She winced in wait for their
laughter......it
didn't come. She opened her eyes to see the two of them talking
quietly to each other. Then J calls up to her, "Yo, you wanna be a
wicked clown? That's straight, but first you gotta stand up to one
thing. Come down here, bitch, follow me."
Mana
dropped to the ground, rubbed her now sore ass, and caught up with
Shaggy. "Where'd J go?" Shaggy smiled at a thought and said,
"Around. Just follow me."
They
walked back into the big top and outside to the carnival grounds.
Mana heard a familiar voice calling from the House of Mirrors.
"Come on! Who's next for the House of Mirrors?!" Shaggy looked at
Mana, "Come on....it's your turn." He put his hand on her back and
pushed her towards the odd looking fun house. It's not that she
didn't want to go, but she knew what went on in there, and was
shocked at the fact that this was the test she had to endure. Mana
watched J maniacally smile as she walked through the curtain to
the inside. All was dark, she couldn't even see her hand in front
of her face. Just then, a white light flickered on. Just one pool
of light spilled onto her head and around her feet. Just in front
of her, however, she could see a dead body propped up with it's
back against a mirror. His forehead was partially caved in, and
there was a fairly large spiderweb crack webbing out from the
middle of the pane of glass. She closed her eyes and swallowed
hard. Then opened them to see straight in front of her. The rest
of the lights were on, and she could clearly see the maze of
mirrors. A figure appeared in several of them now. It was J....and
behind him was Shaggs, smiling. "Look into the mirror, Mana. Any
of them. Let's see what kind of beast you really are." Mana
timidly looked around for the nearest one. Hold it....why am I so
shy? Fuck this! A look of confidence washed over her and she
casually walked up to a mirror and peered into the smooth glass.
Her image twisted and warped until it rested on an image she was
stunned to see but had hoped for at the same time. However, the
actual sight of it was more than she thought it would be. She
stared at an image of herself only dressed all in black, black
widelegged jeans with a tight black belly shirt. Her hair fell
around her shoulders and framed a now black and white face. Her
face was that of a sinister clown with long black lines extended
from her right eye. Her smile curved up just above her eyes and
arched out towards her temple. A little black dot on her
nose.
"Kewl,"
J said, "welcome to the carnival. Now all you have to do is step
up to your first victim."
She
turned to face the mirror they were in to find they stood before
her. She now looked as she saw herself in the mirror. "Where to
from here?"
"The
wagons, ninja." They made their way back to the wagons, which were
already packed and ready to go. Next thing Mana knew, she was in
Roxboro, North Carolina. "Isn't there someone here you need to
take care of?" Shaggy asked Mana expectantly. Mana nodded, "Yeah,
there is one bitch." She knew who they were speaking of. Mrs.
Patricia Brewer, the main assistant principal of Person High
School. She wasn't going to be unjustly punished either. "One
thing. Can we do this at the school?" "Sure, why not!" Mana smiled
and said, "Wonderful..."
The
plans were set and the only thing left to do was surprise miss
bitch in her office the next day. She had spoken to her boy Munky
and he had his own part to play. Now the juggalos just say in some
seedy hotel room drinkin 40's and smokin mad blunts. After a while
Shaggs got up and went to some tittie bar with Billy Bill and
Poncho....they left saying something about the
"Triple
Threat." J just laughed, Mana wanted to go, but Shaggs said that
would fuck up the Triple Threat, so she couldn't go. So she sat
back down with J and smoked another fatty, and downed one more 40
to the head. J looked at her, laughed, shook his head and opened
another for himself. Tomorrow was here and Mana awoke to a kick in
the ass. "Wake up, bitch! It's time to go! What's your stupid ass
doin' still sleepin?!" Mana jumped to her feet and looked around.
She didn't have a hangover, but there were empty bottles
everywhere...and in the ash tray there were about 20 blunt
roaches. Cool, she thought. Then, they were off to Person High
School.
"Mrs.
Brewer? Can I talk to you?" Munky was already in her office
keeping her there, trying his hardest not to show his excitement
about the clowns that were already on their way there. "Well, see,
there's this problem we have," Munky started. Then was rudely
interrupted by the fat bitch, "We, David? Who's we?" Suddenly
there came a voice from the door,
"We
are, bitch." Mrs. Brewer looked up towards the door and there
stood three clowns, clearly they weren't there for
entertainment...or not the kind she was used to. One looked like a
student she used to know.
"Mrs.
Brewer, it's been a long time," Mana spoke. It IS her! Mrs. Brewer
thought to herself. "How things been?" Mrs. Brewer stammered,
"Well, I've-"
"ENOUGH!"
Mana shouted. "We're here for a reason, bitch, enough with the
bullshit." Munky sat in a nearby chair to
watch.
"Now,
Mrs. Brewer, is your time to pay for the shit you put all of us
through. What you put me through and my homies. Hey J, what
attraction should we take her to first?"
"I
don't know, she a fat bitch though, I like fat bitches. Can't I
fuck her fat rump first?" They all laughed. Mrs. Brewer looked
unsure, but there was a small glimmer of hope in her
eyes.
"Sure
J, hey bitch, get out them stank ass drawers an let this ninja hit
it."
So the
bitch stripped down real quick and J hit that shit like a cave
man. The others didn't watch, they just stood outside and smoked a
blunt. When J was done nuttin', he opened the
door.
"J,
the bitch is still naked." Shaggs laughed. "She gonna die naked
and shit!" He laughed harder.
Mrs
Brewer spoke up, "Well, I let him fuck me, will you let me go?!"
"No,
bitch! What you think this is?" Shaggs
said.
"Yeah,
hoe," J spoke up, "and I think I got bugs on my nuts again. Damn
it,
I just
got rid of these little critters. Shoulda said somethin'! I'm
gonna have to smack you in your fuckin' mouth!" (SMACK)!
"Bitch."
"Now,
for all your injustice. For all the times you pinned shit on us
for no reason. For all the times you fucked up our records for
bullshit. For the times you got my boys sent to facilities and
rehabilitation and county lock up for your own bullshit reasons.
Now, you get your mutha fuckin' head chopped off!" Mana lifted the
rusted ax high and swung as hard as she could.
Patricia
Brewer's big ass head came off in one clean swipe. It rolled
around on the floor for a minute. Munky just sat there and laughed
his ass off.
"Hey
J, let's put her in the wax museum."
Patricia
Brewer's body was added to the other thousands of dead souls. Her
body and head was covered in wax and put on display. Mana was now
part of the ICP. She was a wicked clown.
"Hey,
bitch, come here, we got somethin for ya." J lead the way to a
stage. Mana peered out from the back, there were thousands of
juggalos in the crowd screamin for J and Shaggs. "Yo, you're in
this one. Not much vocals or nothin, but you'll be on stage. Mana
was handed a mic, and the three were shoved on stage with the rest
of the ICP. They did "Down with the Clown", "Pass Me By",
"Everybody Rise", and "Clown Love". Mana just jumped around in the
back, stage dived, and all that shit. It was fresh shit. After the
show, Shaggy had the shaggy cam out and there were mad juggalos
chillin backstage. She was introduced as the newest ninja to run
with the ICP.
* * *
* *
Crystal
stood in the valley of many rolling green hills at dusk. She
really wasn't sure what had just happened. In the distance the
silhouette of a wagon train appeared over the hill. They came up
fast with logos of odd circus attractions. It stopped next to her,
and the driver looked like the Ringmaster. He leaned toward her,
his face inches from hers and said, "At last, I have a purpose."
He smiled a wide maniacal grin, he never sat back. Just then she
felt a presence behind her. She turned to come face to face with
her old nemesis, Mana. Crystal just stared in disbelief, paralyzed
and unable to find her voice.
"Crystal,
been a long time, bitch. Now your bitch ass is mine, and I think
the attraction for you is Violent J's Funhouse. Are you ready for
the ride of your life?" Crystal's eyes got wide and tears
involuntarily rolled down her cheeks. Mana just laughed in the
stupid bitch's face. Then Crystal found herself surrounded by
wicked clowns with Twiztid jumpin around in the
background,
screamin obscenities at the bitch. Crystal screamed and kicked as
she was dragged to the Funhouse where J waited with a grin. The
last thing that could be heard was the door to the House shut, the
coaster start, and Crystal's screams pitch to a high octave and
drift off and then silence. Mana smiled, the bitch got
hers.
THE
END.
From:
Pigfarmer4293@aol.com
Date: Tue, 2 Jan
2001 11:24:17 EST
Subject: secret
info regarding the 6th jokers cards name
To:
Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
ok
listen.....on the new bizzar-bizaar cds there is a secret on the
song bizzar...around 2:25-2:35 on the timer theres a part where
violent j says something backwards then hes like "play that back
for secret info." and i played it back and it just says the "the
6th card up is holy" does that mean the 6th jokers card is gonna
be called holy? i dunno
p.s.
more to come from me
TO ALL MY REAL
JUGGALOS/JUGGALETTES:
a sincere
message from Carnie Clown/Miss Rotten Treats.....whichever one of
my aliases you refer to me by:
CALL THIS
NUMBER: 1-414-962-8337 this little punk ass's name is PAUL
SHEVELEV and he pissed me off big time and i told him I'm gonna
get mine and I meant it, please try and help me get my revenge,
fuck with him, do something. THis weekend hes gettin the shit beat
outta him so warn him its comin hahaha
peace out
MCL
-Jessica
From:
D-S-JUGGALOS-U@webtv.net (CHERRY SPOON)
Date: Tue, 30
Jan 2001 11:23:34 -0500 (EST)
To:
CARNIE_CLOWN@REALJUGGALOS.COM
Subject: CALLIN
ALL NINJAS!
*DOWN SOUTH
JUGGALOS UNITE*
SPREADING THE
WORD OF THE DARK CARNIVAL.
AN ORGINIZATION
CREATED INITIALLYTO UNITE JUGGALOS IN FLORIDA IS ON
A
MISSION TO TAKE
OVER THE NATION. WE WOULD LIKE FOR YOU TO MENTION US
ON
YOUR WEBSITE
SPREADN DA WORD ABOUT OUR JUGGALO THROW DOWNS. DSJU WILL
BE
HOLDING MONTHLY
JUGGALO THROW DOWNS STARTING IN MARCH. TO RECIEVE
WORD
OF EACH EVENT AS
WELL AS UPDATES VEIWERS OF YOUR SITE CAN BE
INSTUCTED
TO EMAIL US AT
D-S-JUGGALOS-U@WEBTV.NET
WITH YOUR STATE
AND CITY IN THE SUBJECT LINE & TO BE ADDED TO THE
MAILNG
LIST. DSJU
INVITES ALL JUGGALOS TO BRING THEIR OWN FLAVA TO THROW
DOWNS
ENTER FREESTYLIN
CONTEST & MUCH MORE. THROW DOWNS BEGIN IN FLORIDA
SOOOO
IF YOU KNOW ANY
FLA. JUGGALOS PASS DIS MESSAGE ON.......OR WE
LL
STRAIGHT FUCK YO
ASS UP FOR MISREPRESENTIN DA JUGGALOS. ALSO
TELLIN
VIEWERS TO SEND
MAD EMAIL TO YO FRIEND & MINE
JELLYNUTS@INSANECLOWNPOSSE.COM
REQUESTIN DOWN
SOUTH JUGGALOS UNITE VISIT THEIR TOWN & INCLUDE
OUR
E-MAIL ADDRESS
WOULD BE HELLY TITE AS WELL. WE ASO WANNA LET
EVERYONE
KNOW THIS A
NONPROFIT MISSION & ALL PROCEEDS & DONATIONS TO US
GO
STICKTLY TO
MAKIN EACH PARTY LIVE 'R
IF THERE IS
ANYWAY YOU CAN HELP WE ARE LOOKIN FOR MORE
FOUNDATION
NINJAS TO CARRY
OUT DA MISSION & THAT GOES FOR YOUR SITE VIEWERS
TOO.
SO EMAIL US BACK
ABOUT YOU REPRESENTIN . WE LL ALSO BE HAPPY TO
ANSWER
ANYQUESTIONS YOU
MAY HAVE
MCL MY TWIZTID
SERIAL KILLAS
SUPPORT YOUR
LOCAL JUGGALO!
*DOWN SOUTH
JUGGALOS UNITE*
From: "Dar Dar"
<dardar101@hotmail.com>
To:
carnie_clown@realjuggalos.com
Subject: RE:
Sixth Jokers Card
Date: Fri, 02
Mar 2001 21:08:19 -0600
The song Bizzar
on the Bizzar C.D. J sings something wierd then he says play
the backwards
for secret info either my radio is screwed up which i dont
really think it
is but backwards it says the sixth card up is
holy
Date: Fri, 30
Mar 2001 19:52:24 -0800
From: "JAKE
MILLER" <thajokersbox@freeprogz.com>
To:
Carnie_Clown@realjuggalos.com
Subject: A
MESSAGE FOR THA BULLETIN BOARD
GREETINGS,
YALL.
IF ANY OF YOU
HAVE NOTICED, THERE ARE WAAAAAY TOO MANY FEMINEM FANS ON THE
INTERNET, THATS
WHY, WITH THE HELP OF LETHAL FRAGMENT 3.0, I HAVE COMPILED A
VIRUS THAT I
SEND TO EMINEM FANS THAT CRASHES THEIR COMPUTER,DELETING
EVERYTHING, AND
LEAVING A NICE LITTLE MESSAGE. BUT I CANT DO IT ALL BY MYSELF,
SO E-MAIL ME AND
TELL ME WHAT MESSAGE TO DISPLAY, AND ILL SEND IT TO YOU, BUT
WHEN YOU GET IT,
OPEN IT AND FORWARD IT, DO NOT DOWNLOAD THE FILE UNLESS YOUR AN
IDIOT. OR YOU
CAN DOWNLOAD LETHAL FRAGMENT AND MAKE YER OWN VIRUS. I CAN ALSO
CONNECT TO THEIR
COMPUTER WITH SOME PROFESSIONAL TOOLS I HAVE, BUT THEY'VE BEEN
FUCKING UP
LATELY AND IT USUALLY TAKES A WHILE, SO YOUR BEST BET IS THE
VIRUS.
P.S.{FOR ALL OF
YOU THAT KEEP E-MAILING ME FOR THOSE ANTI-EMINEM SONGS I WROTE,
I NO LONGER SEND
THEM OUT, BECUASE OF PERPATRATAS THAT PUT THEM ON THEIR WEAK
LITTLE HOMEPAGES
SAYING THAT THEY WROTE THEM}
-(S.K.D.1.3.)
From:
InsaneClownMan14@aol.com
Date: Fri, 20
Apr 2001 17:31:28 EDT
Subject: Re:
AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!
To:
carnie_clown@realjuggalos.com
just ask
www.newgrounds.com to supply u with games that let u kill eminem,
